Tomorrow, on July 1, my wonderful husband and I are going to Chicago to celebrate our 10th anniversary! We're so excited! We plan on going to a nice dinner, then see the Blue Man Group, then spend the night in Chicago. We even arranged for 24 hours (approximately) of babysitting for a flat rate of $100!!!
It was a very busy June in the Lashley house! We started it off with Emma's ballet and tap recital. She did excellent (of course!) Here's a couple of pictures from that. Not long after that, Emma and I went to a waterfall near Kentucky (Bella stayed home - she had no desire for a hike), where I got not 1, but TWO ticks, one of which we found in my hair while visiting friends in Michigan! Ewww!!! Thankfully, only 1 of the ticks had attached itself, and I promptly got on homeopathic remedies. Then, Emma had Little Flowers camp (so much fun!), where she earned a tea party badge, and a corporal works of mercy badge. They even had adoration there this year! So awesome! A few hours after Little Flowers camp ended, Emma and I went to pick Bella up from her dad, and the 3 of us drove to Maryland, where we spent the week doing the D.C. thing and reconnecting with my dad's family that I hadn't seen since he died about 22 years ago. We even got a 4 generation picture with my 94 year old grandmother! Here's a few fun pictures of our week! While we were there, I developed a weird pimple on or REALLY close to the place the tick had bitten me, so now I'm on 10 days of a special antibiotic. Yay! When we finally got back from Maryland, late Sunday night, we went to bed, and got up early on Monday to go to VBS, where I was teaching music. It has been every day from 9-noon. It's been fun, but exhausting. On Tuesday, after VBS, the girls and I (and one of Emma's friends from church) went to Splash Island (a waterpark), and then Emma's friend spent the night. It was the only sleepover we've hosted that I would consider doing again. She did great! Yesterday, we went to the zoo after VBS to see the polar bear before she left (she went to a polar bear nursing home in Detroit), but we were too late. :-( We were happily surprised to find, though, that they have a 3 month old baby girl orangutan, and 3 lion cubs! Finally, today, I went to court for Bella (if you remember, not long before this last Christmas, Bella's father - out of nowhere - decided that I should NEVER see her again). I'm happy to report that the current schedule stays the same, I have to attend her therapy sessions (which I already would have been doing, had I known about them), and her father and I have to go to parenting classes. No biggie. :-) :-) :-)
Tomorrow, on July 1, my wonderful husband and I are going to Chicago to celebrate our 10th anniversary! We're so excited! We plan on going to a nice dinner, then see the Blue Man Group, then spend the night in Chicago. We even arranged for 24 hours (approximately) of babysitting for a flat rate of $100!!!
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So, I finally got up my nerve to take a pregnancy test this morning, and it was negative. I'd had just about every pregnancy symptom in the book, and was SO SURE that I was pregnant again. Of course, well meaning people keep telling me stories of people who got negative pregnancy tests until 19 weeks, or whenever, and were actually pregnant, but my body cruelly decided to let me think I was pregnant until I tested, and then all my symptoms vanished. No more morning sickness, more energy, etc. I was totally heartbroken early this morning, then started feeling some better, and went and got my hair cut. Now I'm back to wanting to cry, and snapping at the kids (who have been bickering and driving me crazy today), so I'm currently hiding in my room. I'm so tired. Probably from the stress and heartbreak. Meanwhile, the doctor wants me to stay on the progesterone and heparin until I get my period, which is already overdue, in case it was just too early to test. I'm positive that it wasn't, especially since all of my symptoms are gone now (except for being a crazy, hormonal, emotional mess...), so I'm thinking about stopping them anyway. Especially the heparin shots. It was hard enough stabbing myself in the gut when I thought there was a baby to help. Now that I know there's not...I don't know. Anyways, I guess at least I'll be able to fit into my nice clothes when we go back to court at the end of the month for Bella. Silver linings, eh? *sigh*
I'm just so tired of this emotional roller coaster. I was totally fine with not getting pregnant this cycle, and had actually planned on avoiding pregnancy this month so that my new Napro dr could check my progesterone level with no urgency, and then I had that moment of weakness, followed by ALL those pregnancy symptoms, and had resigned myself to getting pregnant before I was really ready, only to be disappointed, let down, crushed, and get my hopes dashed all over again. And this, folks, is why I practically get panic attacks at the thought of taking a pregnancy test. I wish I never had to take another one again, but my lovely insurance company has decided that they won't cover my heparin until I get a positive pregnancy test. So, I have to test to make them happy, or pay $160 a month for heparin (instead of like $30 a month when they're covering it). My Napro also needs me to test, so they know when to start closely monitoring my progesterone levels. Well, I'll have at least, what? 3 weeks or so before I start the crazy cycle all over again? :'-( I wish I could just get off the roller coaster for awhile. But, no can do. Nobody's getting any younger, and if we want a baby, this is what we have to do. So, if you wouldn't mind saying a prayer or two for my sanity, that would be awesome. Thanks, Dana |
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September 2017
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